So last night Bryan decided to try to teach me to Kayak down the Looking Glass River...It totally didn't go to well. What I had envisioned was paddling up river, getting a good work out and spending quality time with the husband. What really happened? I did pretty good going down stream, but once we turned around to go up stream it became a disaster. I have no idea what i was doing wrong, but i couldn't paddle fast enough or keep the damn Kayak straight. I kept running into logs, brush and even ran into the bridge. To top it all off, I was being eaten alive by the mosquitos that were breeding on top of the water. It pretty much sucked to say the least. I left the park with a broken and disappointed heart. I was disappointed and mad at myself because I thought i would be able to get the hang of it and also because I could tell that Bryan was disappointed too. He always thinks that I just dont try hard enough, and I will admit that I really do not usually try to do much of anything that pretains exersize, but this time I really was trying hard. So instead of getting exersize kayaking, I went for a 6 mile walk/run. It was relaxing, it gave me time to think, the mosquitos left me alone, and I got to enjoy the sweet smell of spring all while burning calories. You ever notice how many wonderful smells there are in the spring? last night I was over whelmed with the smell of lilacs and blossoming peonies.
This weekend Is Memorial Day weekend. On my walk last night I started to reflect on Memorial Day a year ago. (see I told you that IF effects you every single day) Last Year I took Megan and Gunner to the Memorial Day Parade. Last year, I was starting stims for IVF, last year I thought that it would be the last year i took someone elses child to the parade, last year I hadnt suffered a crappy egg retireval, aspirated pneumonia, or a major tooth infection. Last year i hadn't even known what it was like for someone to tell you that you were pregnant, last year I hadn't suffered a horrible miscarriage, D&C, or methotrexate injections. Infertility changes your life but having a miscarriage, loosing the baby you fought so hard for, scars your heart forever.
